We got to school at 8:45am and I walked her to the door, she gave me a hug and kiss and told me she loved me. She grabbed her teachers hand and walked right into the school. I waited about 10 minutes (read: drove around the block a few times in my car and cried), and then went to spy on her through the one way mirror looking into her classroom. She did not shed one single tear all day! I was so proud of her. I on the other hand.......okay, let's not go there!
Tuesday - I pulled up to the school, the teacher opened the backseat door to get Makenzy out and Kenz quickly exclaimed "Bye Mommy, time for me to go to school - love you!" I breathed a deep sigh of relief. Today was going to be another great day! I thought about her all day long while I was at work; wondering what she was doing, if she was making friends, if she was being shy, if she was listening to the teacher, etc. My Mom called me around 11:58 after she had picked Makenzy up from school. She said "Kenzy has cried from the time you dropped her off until the time I just picked her up" I said "SHUT UP!" then my Mother grounded me for a week with no tv. She said "No, I'm serious!" but she was FINE when I dropped her off. I watched her walk into the building tear free with a smile on her face! So I said "Well, let me talk to her" she got on the phone and in a sudden split second melt down she began to cry and say "I need you Mama, I don't want to go to school anymore" oh dear sweet baby Jesus is all I could think. I thought we were home free! I thought she loved school so much that certainly she would skip straight to the third grade at 4 years old! She wanted me to meet them for lunch, but I wasn't able to leave work then. So, I had my Mom bring her up to see me. When they got here Makenzy kissed me a million times and kept telling me how much she loved me. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes were glossy and her voice was raspy. She reall did CRY for a full 3 hours (all the while, still painting 3 pictures and making a paper sheep)!
Wednesday - she woke up at 7am and the first words muttered out of her mouth were "I don't want to go to school today". Dangitt - here we go again! She cried off and on for 2 hours before we had to leave to take her to school. She was so upset and determined not to go that she even refused to eat breakfast! I wanted to just say "Okay, you don't have to go" but I knew that would not be doing her any favors. We came to an agreement that I would walk her into school and in return she would not cry. Well, we walk into school, get to her class and she performs a death grip onto my jeans. "Mama, I need you - Mama, don't leave me" My heart was breaking into a million pieces and I wanted to just hold my baby girl run out of school and never take her back! I stayed composed, kissed her on her cheek and told her I loved her. I stood up and walked right out not being able to look back at her, even though I wanted to! I called the secretary around 9:30 and she said that Makenzy had stopped crying hard, but was still a little sobby. I felt a little better, but still felt like crap! My Mom got there around 11:30 and spyed on the class through the one way mirror. She called and said that Makenzy was doing great and even tattled on a little boy for moving in his chair (we are working on the whole tattling issue). She called me after school and let me talk to Makenzy. She got on the phone and said "Mama, I had a great day!" YAY - only half a day of trauma is better than a whole day!
Last night she was VERY happy to hear that she was done with school for the week! We'll see what Monday brings, but I am praying for a cry-free week!
